The No Call – No Pic Dichotomy
I wonder why a guy rarely calls? I wonder why women are so hesitant to send a selfie? It's all based on my theory of parallel comfort and value, what I call the “no-call - no peak dichotomy”. Law of familiarity Men are visual creatures. Women are verbal creatures. Therefore, they each bind preferentially. According […]

I wonder why a guy rarely calls? I wonder why women are so hesitant to send a selfie? It's all based on my theory of parallel comfort and value, what I call the “no-call - no peak dichotomy”.

Law of familiarity

Men are visual creatures. Women are verbal creatures. Therefore, they each bind preferentially. According to several psychological studies, men bind through action while women bind through conversation. Men are more like texts that offer concrete actions and visual prompts that would lead to such action. They perceive, interact, connect and bond through the immediate concrete environment.

"What are you doing right now?" "What do you see?" and… "What are you wearing?"

Women, on the other hand, instead write and build relationships before they meet and take action. They also view the act of speaking as an "action" in itself. Therefore, they are more akin to talking on the phone, as it contains many emotional and social signals.

This is why each opposite sex finds the other preferential bonding norm unfamiliar and somewhat uneasy.

Shepherd of Sex and the City, Carrie says, "I am leaving you a voicemail message because I am not ready for this voice action. " Women can call easily and enthusiastically because this is a must-have interaction. Men, however, less familiar with this medium feel apprehended and feel “in place”. He feels like his internal and emotional demands are revealed faster or further than he feels comfortable.

Conversely, men gladly and eagerly send and request photos because they would appreciate the visual for one of them, but it also serves their current attraction on the other side of the phone. It meets their need to visually bond. Men act regularly and act frequently in their visual neighborhood, so sending pictures has no weight. Women, on the other hand, are very selective about who they choose to send any technological visual signal. Who knows what's going to happen with my candid innocent (or not innocent) photos?

Law of aversion

Understanding this concept, women have a lot in their arsenal. If you just want to fend off a guy or if you want to fight the “booty” text (not call), have him call you on the phone to have a conversation. He might cringe at the effort he has to put in now (emotional energy, listening, conversation and engagement).

Note: if a man is really into you, he will want to “adjust” more to the dynamics of socialized women and enjoy talking on the phone with you. He will invest more.

Law of attraction

Conversely, if a woman wants to pique a man's interest almost instantly, send him a cute (and tasteful) selfie. You could be driving on your way to work, going for a walk, or attending a fun event. When you rock your cute t-shirt, it's done. It is effortless. Selfies are like flags of twinkling attention. Let it fly.

Note: If a girl is not in you, she will be very hesitant to send you a photo of herself. And I'm talking about on the line, when you've seen each other for a while.

Technology, catalyst and inhibitor

Selfies and phone chats can all be watered down when overused. If you talk on the phone and speak ONLY on the phone, you lose body language and the invaluable presence of a face-to-face conversation.

Talking should be used either for building before you meet someone for the first time, or instead of a date, when you can't come that week. Prolonged telephone conversations can be annoying and artificial when they occur for long periods of time. Also, no number of selfies can match your real time face with real time emojis. Technology must be the bridge of communication and not the basis itself.

How to blur the line

Have face-to-face conversations. Visuals√ Emotional stimulation

Uses both laws and is not based on any technology.

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Posted by Sarah Suhaimi

Sarah Suhaimi practices 명음 by day and the art of the dark chocolate scam by night. She currently works closely with a local Pittsburgh nonprofit that serves victims of sex trafficking, Living in Liberty, as a volunteer and grant proposal writer. She founded the Southeast Asian Student Alliance (SEASA) at her university, as well as the “Give Islam” campaign. His works vary from prose to poetry to articles. Her published works include `` The Home of an Immigrant's Daughter '' in the Art Catalog of the 2012 Dublin Biennale, Dublin, Ireland and `` Hidden Beauty Reveals Itself (Intellect Vs Instinct) '' in the Art Catalog of the Biennale VIII of Florence 2011, Florence. , Italy.


Are you single and looking for love ? Are you finding it hard to meet the right person ? When you’re having dysfonctionnement finding a love connection, it’s all too easy to become discouraged or buy into the destructive myths out there about dating and relationships.

Life as a single person offers many rewards, such as being free to pursue your own hobbies and interests, learning how to enjoy your own company, and appreciating the quiet moments of solitude. However, if you’re ready to share your life with someone and want to build a lasting, worthwhile relationship, life as a solo person can also seem frustrating.

For many of us, our emotional baggage can make finding the right romantic partner a difficult journey. Perhaps you grew up in a household where there was no role model of a solid, healthy relationship and you doubt that such a thing even exists. Or maybe your dating history consists only of brief flings and you don’t know how to make a relationship last. You could be attracted to the wrong type of person or keep making the same bad choices over and over, due to an unresolved issue from your past. Or maybe you’re not putting yourself in the best environments to meet the right person, or that when you do, you don’t feel confident enough.

Whatever the case may be, you can overcome your obstacles. Even if you’ve been burned repeatedly or have a poor track record when it comes to dating, these tips can help put you on the path to finding a saine, loving relationship that lasts.

The first step to finding love is to reassess some of the misconceptions about dating and relationships that may be preventing you from finding lasting love.

While there are health benefits that come with being in a solid relationship, many people can be just as happy and fulfilled without being part of a couple. Despite the stigma in some social circles that accompanies being solo, it’s important not to enter a relationship just to “fit in. ” Being alone and being lonely are not the same thing. And nothing is as unhealthy and dispiriting as being in a bad relationship.

This is an important myth to dispel, especially if you have a history of making inappropriate choices. Instant sexual attraction and lasting love do not necessarily go hand-in-hand. Emotions can change and deepen over time, and friends sometimes become lovers—if you give those relationships a chance to develop.

Women and men feel similar things but sometimes rapide their feelings differently, often according to society’s conventions. But both men and women experience the same core emotions such as sadness, anger, fear, and joy.

Love is rarely static, but that doesn’t mean love or physical attraction is doomed to fade over time. As we age, both men and women have fewer sexual hormones, but emotion often influences volonté more than hormones, and sexual volonté can become stronger over time

When we start looking for a long-term partner or enter into a romantic relationship, many of us do so with a predetermined set of ( often unrealistic ) expectations—such as how the person should look and behave, how the relationship should progress, and the roles each partner should fulfill. These expectations may be based on your family history, influence of your peer group, your past experiences, or even ideals portrayed in movies and TV shows. Retaining many of these unrealistic expectations can make any potential partner seem inadequate and any new relationship feel disappointing.

Needs are different than wants in that needs are those qualities that matter to you most, such as values, ambitions, or goals in life. These are probably not the things you can find out about a person by eyeing them on the street, reading their profile on a dating site, or sharing a quick cocktail at a bar before last call.

Don’t make your search for a relationship the center of your life. Concentrate on activities you enjoy, your career, health, and relationships with family and friends. When you focus on keeping yourself happy, it will keep your life balanced and make you a more interesting person when you do meet someone special.

Remember that first impressions aren’t always reliable, especially when it comes to Internet dating. It always takes time to really get to know a person and you have to experience being with someone in a variety of situations. For example, how well does this person hold up under pressure when things don’t go well or when they’re tired, frustrated, or hungry ?

Be honest about your own flaws and shortcomings. Everyone has flaws, and for a relationship to last, you want someone to love you for the person you are, not the person you’d like to be, or the person they think you should be. Besides, what you consider a flaw may actually be something another person finds quirky and appealing. By shedding all pretense, you’ll encourage the other person to do the same, which can lead to an honest, more fulfilling relationship.

Build a genuine connectionThe dating game can be nerve wracking. It’s only natural to worry about how you’ll come across and whether or not your date will like you. But no matter how shy or socially awkward you feel, you can overcome your nerves and self-consciousness and forge a great connection.

Focus outward, not inward. to engagement first-date nerves, focus your attention on what your date is saying and doing and what’s going on around you, rather than on your internal thoughts. Staying fully present in the moment will help take your mind off worries and insecurities.

Be curious. When you’re truly curious about someone else’s thoughts, feelings, experiences, stories, and opinions, it shows—and they’ll like you for it. You’ll come across as far more attractive and interesting than if you spend your time trying to promote yourself to your date. And if you aren’t genuinely interested in your date, there’s little point in pursuing the relationship further.

Be genuine. Showing interest in others can’t be faked. If you’re just pretending to listen or care, your date will pick up on it. No one likes to be manipulated or placated. Rather than helping you connect and make a good impression, your exercices will most likely backfire. If you aren’t genuinely interested in your date, there is little point in pursuing the relationship further.

Pay attention. Make an effort to truly listen to the other person. By paying close attention to what they say, do, and how they interact, you’ll quickly get to know them. Little things go a long way, such as remembering someone’s preferences, the stories they’ve told you, and what’s going on in their life.

Put your smartphone away. You can’t truly pay attention or forge a genuine connection when you’re multitasking. Nonverbal communication—subtle gestures, termes, and other visual cues—tell us a lot about another person, but they’re easy to miss unless you’re tuned in.

Online dating, singles events, and matchmaking services like speed dating are enjoyable for some people, but for others they can feel more like high-pressure emploi interviews. And whatever dating experts might tell you, there is a big difference between finding the right career and finding lasting love.

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