What if you weren't who you thought you were? A DNA test reveals that Dani Shapiro's father was not really his father.
Dani Shapiro had been questioned all her life about her ethnicity. With blond hair and blue eyes, even though her parents were Orthodox Jews, people had told her since she was a baby that she couldn't be Jewish. And then, in her mid-fifties, she received the shock of her life after taking a DNA test. This is the story told in his memories Heritage.
Shapiro took the OTC DNA test on a whim at her husband's request. When the tests return, she compares it to a test from her half-sister and finds out that her father is not her biological father. Shapiro is quickly able to determine who his biological father is through test results, the internet, and the help of active knowledge in genealogy.
The mystery of how she was conceived continues to arise as she recalls a conversation with her mother many years ago. This opens up the world of infertility treatment of the 1960s and it is here that much of the book remains. While she is able to understand how she was probably conceived, she must understand the implications of this knowledge.
Shapiro appeals to the few people still alive who may have heard of what happened when she was conceived, including doctors, family, and others who knew her parents who are all two deaths. She longs to know if her beloved father knew and what that means for the relationship they had.
She is able to connect with her new biological father and part of his family. Ultimately, she comes to understand who she was, who she is now, and what that means to her identity.
The book provides interesting information about the beginnings of fertility treatments in the United States, where we are now, and the ethics of things like sperm and egg donation and the long-term effects of DNA testing on babies born this way.
The memory process
Shapiro has been telling stories about his life for years. This is his fifth memoir. Previous memories included Hourglass, devotion, fixed writing: the perils and pleasures of a creative life, and Slow motion who touched on topics such as her marriage, spirituality, her son's rare seizure disorder, and his parents' car accident and the death of his father.
I found the passages where she spoke of writing memoirs particularly interesting. She recounted how she felt as if she felt like capturing and finally understanding her life and the lives of her family as she wrote her memoir:
"There. That's it. Now I understand. I dug until my shovel touched the rock.
She says that contrary to popular belief, she doesn't have a great memory. It's just that she keeps writing until she is able to find the story.
I am also the diver who discovered the black box. What is this? I had searched for it all my life without knowing it existed. Now I have it in my hands. It may or may not contain clues. It is a witness to a story that he recorded but did not see.
DANI SHAPIRO, HERITAGE
I found this explanation particularly interesting because as a memoir writer you often have the facts, but the truth of the story is often more difficult to uncover. Once Shapiro had the facts about his genetics, the meaning was up to her to decipher.
This message was previously published on catherinelanser.com
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About six months before I turned 50, a friend tried to convince me to enter a physique contest. He had just turned 40, and was thrilled to be in the over-40 category because there were fewer guys for him to compete against. He said to me, “Kirk, you can win the over-50 category. There are only a few guys who enter. But, you have no lats or traps—most older dudes don’t. Work on your back and you got it in the bag ! ” I wasn’t too excited to enter a competition with “no competition, ” but I was pretty peeved to hear him say I had no lats or traps. My back was better than that. Although I had no intention to enter the competition, I started doing more single-arm dumbbell rows to work my back. Now, a few years later, it’s one of my favorite dumbbell exercises. Importantly, I’m not trying to break any records when it comes to weight here, like I might have in my younger days. Quality reps at low weight is the bigger focus.
There are variantes of the exercise where you see guys use a bench for support, using a hand or even placing a knee on the bench. These have their merits ( although MH fitness director Ebenezer Samuel, C. S. C. S. would rather you not put a knee up ). However, I mostly do the version with no assistance from the bench with both feet on the ground as points of contact. This version works your traps, rhomboids, rear delts and rotator cuff groupes musculaires, but you also get some core work, something you greatly need as you get older. Remember, though, that the way do the exercise is subjective to your own abilities. If you need some extra support for balance, don’t hesitate to put a hand down.
to set up for my preferred variation, pick up a light dumbbell, especially to start. Stand with your feet in a parallel stance about shoulder-width apart. Hold the dumbbell in a neutral position at your side, as if you would for a hammer curl. Place your free hand behind you, with the back of your hand on the small of your back ( you can also extend your off arm out to balance ). Next, bend over by pushing your butt back and hinging at your waist, with your knees slightly bent. There should be no rounding of the spine, and you should keep your gaze down at the floor in a neutral neck place. Lastly, as you’re hanging onto the dumbbell with your arm pointing to the floor, squeeze your shoulder blades together so your shoulders lock in place and don’t slump.
From this starting position, use your back to pull the dumbbell up without twisting your spine. Pull up as high as you can, pause for a moment at the top and squeeze your shoulder blades together even more. Then release by lowering the dumbbell back to the starting place. tera control my pace, I usually pull up for 2 seconds, squeeze at the top for 2 seconds, then release back to the starting place in 2 seconds.
By doing the dumbbell row unilaterally ( one arm at a time ), you’ll feel yourself being pulled off balance. You must fight with your abs and obliques to maintain balance and stability, which is why I love this exercise so much. Although you won’t be able to load up with as much weight as you would using the bench for stabilization, the extra core work you’ll get makes this version well worth putting in your arsenal of exercises. Try 4 sets of 8 to 10 reps during upper body workouts to get started.
We all know that it’s common for men to skip the doctor until they become sick, injure themselves or are faced with a serious health problem. And a majority of men will postpone seeking care for a few days to see whether they feel any better. It’s the whole ' if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it ' line of thinking.
But there are steps the men in your life can take today to improve their vitality and help prevent health problems down the road. Of course, there are some things that can’t be changed, such as family history and age, but every day choices can have a big impact on their current and future health.
Eating a diet that’s low in fat ( less than 7 percent of kcal should come from saturated fats ), cholesterol, and salt, and packed with fresh fruits and vegetables ( two cups of fruit per day; three cups of vegetables per day for men up to age 50 and two and a half cups for men aged 51 and over ), whole grains and fiber can help improve your health, prevent heart disease, diabetes and certain cancers.
Try to get 30 minutes of moderate physical activity on most days of the week. Taking a walk, jogging, swimming and mowing the lawn all count. But don’t be a weekend sports warrior. Start slowly if you aren’t normally active and gradually build up. No time ? Research shows that even bermuda bursts of physical activity—as few as 10 minutes of intense activity several times a day—can help men improve their health. Talk to your doctor about the right exercise program for you.
It’s important to maintain a saine weight. Excess weight, especially around the waist, can be on your body. Carrying too much body fat forces your heart to work harder and increases your chances of heart disease and stroke, even if you have no other risk factors ! So, try to curb weight gain as you age.
Tobacco smoke contains more than 4, 000 chemicals and is a known cause of cancer. Smoking also increases the likelihood of high blood pressure, heart disease, lung problems and other health problems. And if you think chewing tobacco is safer, think again. Not only is chewing tobacco a known cause of cancer ( carcinogen ), it also contributes to gum disease and tooth loss and may be linked to fertility problems. And, few could argue that chewing and spitting is attractive to a partner. If you smoke or chew, talk to your health care professional about ways to quit. Consider nicotine replacement therapy products that include self-help programs, if appropriate.
Whether it’s pulling out the weed whacker, going for a bike ride or grilling with the neighbors, safety is key. Here are just a few examples : Take care when moving heavy objects. It’s easy to strain yourself when lifting boxes, furniture and other heavy items. Use your knees and legs and not your back for leverage. And ask for help, if you need it. Wear appropriate protective gear for your eyes and ears when using leaf blowers, lawn mowers and other machines at home or work. Excessive exposure to noise is the most common cause of hearing loss. Wear a helmet when you ride a bike or ski and throw on reflective clothing if you go for a run after dark. When grilling, never leave the grill unattended, especially when small children and pets are around, and keep a fire extinguisher handy. The grill should be at least 10 feet from your house or any building. to protect your skin, avoid prolonged exposure to the sun and apply ( and reapply ) sunscreen with an SPF of 15 or greater that provides protection against UVA and UVB rays.