You have a date coming up. You can't wait to take things to the next level and have sex with her for the first time.
Well, let's bring it out into the open ...
The first time you have sex with a new woman will always suck.
But it will suck relatively. It will suck compared to the sex you have together as you continue to feel comfortable with each other.
This is completely normal.
The first time is inevitably filled with anxiety and awkwardness. It's hard to be fully present in the moment and you don't yet know all the little things that are happening.
Once you have sex a few times, however, the two of you will become more in tune with pleasuring each other and sharing how you feel. This increase in comfort sets the stage for a dramatic increase in arousal.
Women know this process takes time! They don't expect you to be a total sex god right off the bat.
Still, so many men put a ton of pressure on themselves to offer women legendary sex from the start. That alone is what causes them so much stress and performance anxiety.
And what is the end result? Men find it difficult to rise to the occasion or have fun, which leads to the exactly disappointing experience they were so terrified of having in the first place.
So I want to show you how to create the best possible first sex experience for everyone. And it starts with doing the opposite what you think you need to do.
Anxiety is an unnecessary mood killer
You often feel anxious when you think about all the "what ifs" of your future. You can feel it when you are obsessed with doing something perfectly and trying to plan for all possible outcomes.
Sexual anxiety is no different. Especially when you're about to get intimate with a new partner, your mind goes wild with all the stress-inducing permutations of what might happen next.
You think about all the things you need to do right: get tough, last a long time, and hit her in the right places. But sometimes you're so concerned about being perfect that you lose your excitement and sabotage the whole experience. It's almost impossible to be turned on while you are anxious.
Ironically, all of those things that you're obsessed with doing "just right" are what women care LEAST about!
Women are really excited to see you horny and passionate about them.
This is not your perfect positioning. Not your endurance. Not finding the perfect place to touch. Not even the size of your member.
Because you are not the only one worrying about this whole ordeal. She wonders if you're having fun or not, when you think the same about her.
So you just gotta to show her that you have a lot of fun. You don't have to be perfect.
Once you do this, a woman can relax and fully immerse herself in her own sexual energy. And There you go! It's an incredible and memorable first experience together.
It may seem counterintuitive, but in order to overcome sexual anxiety you need to start focusing on YOUR pleasure and not just hers.
Here are three techniques to achieve this.
Sex is a journey, not a destination
Yet so many men are focused on achieving the goal. They see the process as a series of steps to be performed without fail ...
“I have to undress her but not ruin the bra. I have to make sure she's really wet. I can't do anything weird to turn it off. I have to fuck her faster and harder and make her cum.
Guys are so stuck on what they're supposed to do next that they often end up rushing for everything.
Women want you slow down.
The physical act of sex is only a small part of the experience. The rising tension, the way things play out, the words you exchange and the sensations you explore together are crucial to sexual intimacy. And doing it all imperfectly and figuring out how to “dance” together, so to speak, is part of the fun.
Emotional and physical foreplay is incredibly hot for women.
Most guys take these steps within minutes to engage in quick, hard penetrating sex. They think it's the “alpha movement”. And that's largely because that's what makes them the most fun.
But most women want at least 10 to 15 minutes of foreplay, if not more, before sex. This progression is often more memorable than anything else.
Sex doesn't have to end in a climax for most women either, and often it won't. Studies show that at least 30 to 50% of the time, women do not orgasm through penetrating sex. And even when they do, it doesn't necessarily happen every time. This is especially true if it is their first sexual encounter with a new partner.
So take… your… time. Don't worry about rushing to the next order of business. Take a relaxed stroll in the privacy and enjoy the time you have to touch, tease and taste each other.
This will keep you present and give you more time to explore the next technique: getting started.
Focus on yourself first
Wife likes to see guy overwhelmed with excitement for her. So you have to make yourself feel like you are exploding with sexual energy.
Right now, think about what turns you on. Consider your most incredible sexual experiences.
Do you like the mystery that comes with seeing a woman slowly undress? Do you like to rub your hands on her smooth legs?
Do you like a lot of kisses? Or kiss her all over her body? Make her kiss yours?
Does the smell of a woman's hair drive you crazy? Or feel her run her hands over your pants? Or see her bend over to tease you?
Do you like when you hear her moan with pleasure? When she tells you how much she wants you, is it the sexiest thing you've ever heard?
Think about what drives you crazy with desire. Then, once you're in the moment with a woman, pay attention and connect with a few of these ideas. Allow yourself to really treat yourself and explore the things that turn you on the most.
Give yourself permission to get horny like never before. If you want her to get involved, you can guide her hands gently or say whatever you want, for example, "Take those cute panties off… slowly."
It might sound selfish, but feeling really horny is essential to good sex. If you find it hard to stay hard or stay present, many women will automatically blame themselves and think it's because they aren't attractive enough.
But once a woman sees how much fun you are having, she can let go of her worries and feel so good that you are turned on with it. her.
Show your desire instead of gauging his
I know you want to make sure a woman is having fun.
But constantly checking in with her or questioning your skills disconnects you from your own emotions of arousal. It takes you out of your body and into your bastard brain.
On top of that, constantly ask, "Do you like this?" "Is it good for you?" "Did you come?" puts a lot of pressure on women. They feel like they need to verbally confirm their arousal instead of just feeling it. They may also become aware of how you perceive them and whether or not they are acting sexy.
But if you took your time and turned on, she's ready to feel your intense desire. Trust that this is EXACTLY how she wants to feel about you.
Run your hands all over her body. Caress and kiss her skin. Grab her body and pull her closer to you as you kiss.
Use your voice. Moan, breathe heavily, and express your pleasure as you walk in and out of her. Tell her how sexy she is. Let her know that you want her more than anything in the world.
Look at her from top to bottom as if you want to devour her. Then, make deep eye contact as your bodies connect more deeply. Show her that you are overwhelmed with passion and that you want to touch her everywhere.
There is nothing quite like being found irresistible by someone we find attractive ourselves. Share your sexual desire. Then she will have more fun than you might imagine.
These ideas will take you out of your anxious mind and into your aroused body.
You don't need perfect technique. You don't need to bring in a girl right away. You don't have to do everything smoothly.
All of these excessive complications are what make bedroom experiences mediocre for everyone.
Because you CAN already give women incredible sexual experiences. You just have to let go of your expectations and learn to enjoy the ride.
Are you solo and looking for love ? Are you finding it to meet the right person ? When you’re having trouble finding a love connection, it’s all too easy to become discouraged or buy into the destructive myths out there about dating and relationships.
Life as a solo person offers many rewards, such as being free to pursue your own hobbies and interests, learning how to enjoy your own company, and appreciating the quiet moments of retraite. However, if you’re ready to share your life with someone and want to build a lasting, worthwhile relationship, life as a single person can also seem frustrating.
For many of us, our emotional baggage can make finding the right romantic partner a difficult journey. Perhaps you grew up in a household where there was no role model of a solid, saine relationship and you doubt that such a thing even exists. Or maybe your dating history consists only of brief flings and you don’t know how to make a relationship last. You could be attracted to the wrong type of person or keep making the same bad choices over and over, due to an unresolved issue from your past. Or maybe you’re not putting yourself in the best environments to meet the right person, or that when you do, you don’t feel confident enough.
Whatever the case may be, you can overcome your obstacles. Even if you’ve been burned repeatedly or have a poor track record when it comes to dating, these tips can help put you on the path to finding a healthy, loving relationship that lasts.
The first step to finding love is to reassess some of the misconceptions about dating and relationships that may be preventing you from finding lasting love.
While there are health benefits that come with being in a solid relationship, many people can be just as happy and fulfilled without being part of a couple. Despite the stigma in some social circles that accompanies being single, it’s important not to enter a relationship just to “fit in. ” Being alone and being lonely are not the same thing. And nothing is as unhealthy and dispiriting as being in a bad relationship.
This is an important myth to dispel, especially if you have a history of making inappropriate choices. Instant sexual attraction and lasting love do not necessarily go hand-in-hand. Emotions can change and deepen over time, and friends sometimes become lovers—if you give those relationships a chance to develop.
Women and men feel similar things but sometimes express their feelings differently, often according to society’s conventions. But both men and women experience the same core emotions such as sadness, anger, fear, and joy.
Love is rarely static, but that doesn’t mean love or physical attraction is doomed to fade over time. As we age, both men and women have fewer sexual hormones, but emotion often influences passion more than hormones, and sexual volonté can become stronger over time
When we start looking for a long-term partner or enter into a romantic relationship, many of us do so with a predetermined set of ( often unrealistic ) expectations—such as how the person should look and behave, how the relationship should progress, and the roles each partner should fulfill. These expectations may be based on your family history, influence of your peer group, your past experiences, or even ideals portrayed in movies and TV shows. Retaining many of these unrealistic expectations can make any potential partner seem inadequate and any new relationship feel disappointing.
Needs are different than wants in that needs are those qualities that matter to you most, such as values, ambitions, or goals in life. These are probably not the things you can find out about a person by eyeing them on the street, reading their profile on a dating site, or sharing a quick cocktail at a bar before last call.
Don’t make your search for a relationship the center of your life. Concentrate on activities you enjoy, your career, health, and relationships with family and friends. When you focus on keeping yourself happy, it will keep your life balanced and make you a more interesting person when you do meet someone special.
Remember that first impressions aren’t always reliable, especially when it comes to Internet dating. It always takes time to really get to know a person and you have to experience being with someone in a variety of situations. For example, how well does this person hold up under pressure when things don’t go well or when they’re tired, frustrated, or hungry ?
Be honest about your own flaws and shortcomings. Everyone has flaws, and for a relationship to last, you want someone to love you for the person you are, not the person you’d like to be, or the person they think you should be. Besides, what you consider a flaw may actually be something another person finds quirky and appealing. By shedding all pretense, you’ll encourage the other person to do the same, which can lead to an honest, more fulfilling relationship.
Build a genuine connectionThe dating game can be nerve wracking. It’s only natural to worry about how you’ll come across and whether or not your date will like you. But no matter how shy or socially awkward you feel, you can overcome your nerves and self-consciousness and forge a great connection.
Focus outward, not inward. to la bataille first-date nerves, focus your attention on what your date is saying and doing and what’s going on around you, rather than on your internal thoughts. Staying fully present in the moment will help take your mind off worries and insecurities.
Be curious. When you’re truly curious about someone else’s thoughts, feelings, experiences, stories, and opinions, it shows—and they’ll like you for it. You’ll come across as far more attractive and interesting than if you spend your time trying to promote yourself to your date. And if you aren’t genuinely interested in your date, there’s little point in pursuing the relationship further.
Be genuine. Showing interest in others can’t be faked. If you’re just pretending to listen or care, your date will pick up on it. No one likes to be manipulated or placated. Rather than helping you connect and make a good impression, your efforts will most likely backfire. If you aren’t genuinely interested in your date, there is little point in pursuing the relationship further.
Pay attention. Make an effort to truly listen to the other person. By paying close attention to what they say, do, and how they interact, you’ll quickly get to know them. Little things go a long way, such as remembering someone’s preferences, the stories they’ve told you, and what’s going on in their life.
Put your smartphone away. You can’t truly pay attention or forge a genuine connection when you’re multitasking. Nonverbal communication—subtle gestures, expressions, and other visual cues—tell us a lot about another person, but they’re easy to miss unless you’re tuned in.
Online dating, singles events, and matchmaking services like speed dating are enjoyable for some people, but for others they can feel more like high-pressure job interviews. And whatever dating experts might tell you, there is a big difference between finding the right career and finding lasting love.